Marketing 101

A long time ago I received an email with jokes about college majors. I remember that Marketing majors were for people that wanted to make the most money with the least amount of work. So I guess I wasn't too surprised when the following two marketing ploys hit my ears.

1. "Spyware can reduce your bandwidth by 500 percent." Apparently this jackass went to the Willy Wonka school of mathematics. You cannot reduce anything by 500%. If I have 10 apples and reduce it by 100%, then I have 0 apples. You can't reduce it any more. Maybe it means that I owe the ISP bandwidth?

2. "95.1, The Fox. Finally, a radio station that respects the music." What the hell is that suppose to mean?!?! Do the other radio stations in Rochester, NY somehow disrespect the music? Do they sleep with a sexy ballad and then give it cab fare and promise to call in the morning?